Blood of a Golden Angel
by Alba aka Luthien Miriel
Summary: I loved you so much, but I made a mistake. I thought I couldn’t wait, I thought I couldn’t wait years and years until you came back from Europe, but now, I know I should have waited all my life if it was necessary, because it would have been for you.


Blood of a Golden Angel

by Alba

_When they began shooting, I was in __a Café by the Tsurumi with Miyako, shading my eyes with my hand, joyful, talking about the future. When you screamed among the flames, bleeding, suffering, I was riding on my bicycle, feeling the wind in my hair. When an ambulance passed, they hoisted you up and drove almost ninety minutes until the next hospital. I was sitting on my balcony and reading a love story. It was a beautiful summer evening in June 2002._

Hikari Kamiya and Takeru Takaishi had gone to the same school in a nice district of Tokyo which was close to the Tokyo Tower. They had become Digiwarriors and had fought together in cruel struggles. After all the adventures in the Digiworld had been over, they had studied together at the Keio University.

Kari thought she had always had a crush on T.K. She didn't remember when she had found out it was more than a crush, it was the love of her life, never mind how cliché this could sound.

_You had once said you'd never bear me a grudge me for marrying __Davis__. You were never able of blaming anyone. When he asked me for my hand and I accepted, furious, furious that you were gone for what I thought would be forever, you didn't as much as blink._

_When Davis and I married, he asked you to be our best man, and you accepted, smiling. You handed us our rings, and wished us good luck. And you seemed so honest… yet I knew inside, you were boiling of anger and jealousy. You gave me a gift, a pendant on a golden chain. The pendant was a simple, tear-shaped ruby, and I thought it was the most beautiful jewel I had ever seen. I knew I would always wear it, under my shirt._

_I loved you so much, but I made a mistake. I thought I couldn't wait, I thought I couldn't wait years and years until you came back from Europe, but now, I know I should have waited all my life if it was necessary, because it would have been for you._

Hikari had always been told she'd go out with Takeru sooner or later, it was meant to be. How could everything go so wrong? How could TK accept a work in Europe and leave her in Japan, all alone? Because she was always alone when she was without him, even when the noise of the crowds deafened her so that she couldn't hear the music from her Discman. She always listened to the same song; it had been TK's favorite, and kissed the ruby that hung from her neck as if it was the man she had adored. And, as a matter of fact, it was, it was his blood, the tear-shaped ruby was his blood.

He had been her entire world, and now he was gone.

_Only one week after my marriage, we made love for the first time, and our love making had something animal, something frantic that is the first feature of forbidden love. It was luck if we didn't tear our clothes away, we were so excited. You kissed my lips, my neck, my shoulders, while I run my fingers through your hair and we turned around in the bed. We couldn't get enough of one another; we stuck our bodies together as if like this, nothing could ever tear us away. We made love once, and again, and again._

"I'm so tired of being here

Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you have to leave

I wish that you would just leave

'cause your presence still lingers here"

_When a careless employee threw a burning cigarette into the bin, you were writing an email to me, telling me you loved me. I read it with avid interest, drinking the words that made my heart beat so fast, faster than it had ever beaten during the nights with __Davis__ when I had felt more alone than ever in my life. You said I was all you wanted; you said my name had such a sweet taste on your lips. You said if __Davis__ wasn't your friend, you'd kill him without hesitating, just because he was my husband and he was allowed to be with me whenever he wanted. And yet when Daisuke was there, you never betrayed your emotions. I first thought you were a coward, but how could I? You were all but a coward; you were the bravest man in the world. You didn't want our wedding to be destroyed by the burning passion that had always united us two, you and me._

"And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I held your hand through all of these years"

_When I noticed I was pregnant, I felt ashamed I didn't know whose child it was. Yours or Davis'? Oh, how I wished it was yours! And now I know it's true, the little Daisuke has your eyes though he has __Davis__' name._

_Davis__ never noticed how much I loved you, he was so blind, so stupid, and yet I couldn't blame him for not realizing the painful truth. But Tai did, I knew it. He once said to me: "you have TK's heart but __Davis__' name and this is adultery". _

_I never felt guilty, though. I knew I was doing the right thing, even if it was betraying my husband. I never felt blameworthy just because I was unfaithful towards the one I had never loved._

_Because I adored _you_ so much.___

"But you still have me

All of me

You used to captivate me

By your resonating light"

Hikari cuddled her son close, and tears rolled down her cheeks. She kissed the baby's forehead with a bit of the passion she had felt for Takeru, and closed her eyes, listening to the music that had now become a part of her life, an ever-lasting memory of the man she had loved.

_When the building began burning, you still didn't go. You stayed behind. Because of __Davis__.__ The ceiling had collapsed, he had found refuge under a marble table, but all around him was burning. And you went to save him, like a hero. Davis told me everything, he was seriously sorry. You did save him, you threw a wet blanket over you and him and, together, you fled from the inferno that the building had become. You were just a few steps away from the window from which you could jump without risking your life, and you pushed __Davis__. He jumped, and then the floor collapsed under your feet._

"Now I'm bound by the life you've left behind

Your face it hurts

My once pleasant dreams

Your voice it chased away

All the sanity in me"

The baby didn't want to sleep; it was looking at his mother, his blue eyes shining. They were not Davis' eyes, but Kari's husband thought they were inherited by his father, who had blue eyes too. These blue eyes awakened so many aching memories in the young woman, she had to look away. The eyes of his father, of the only one… she had adored. So blue, so cold, and yet so magnificently lit up by the beams of the dying stars.

_When the firemen found your body, you were so warm; I thought you might be alive. My own hands felt so cold, I was terrorized, I felt so dead, and you were so warm… but you were dead. And, despite my desperation, _I _was alive. The firemen said it kindly, delicately. Davis fell to his knees, but I didn't care. Sora and Mimi cried, Tai's eyes were wide open, Matt could only scream of pain. Yolei fainted, Izzy held your hand frantically, squeezing it as if it might resuscitate you. Ken was there, too, and he was the only one whose reaction I could understand. He stayed quiet; he only looked at you with a feeling of deep sorrow and anger towards the one who had done this to you. But except in his eyes, nothing of his inner fire was visible. I don't remember if there was anyone else, I couldn't think at all, I was just there, staring at your dead body. Oh, those hands, those arms which had embraced me so fervently, everything just hung lose, your skin was darkened by the scalds the fire had cause, the only recognizable and light part of you were your eyes, wide open, still as icy-blue as always. Your eyes, the eyes of your son._

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone

But though you're still with me

I've been alone all along...

_How will I ever live without you? Yet now it's been one year, and I'm still alive, and I can't understand why. One day, I wanted to kill myself, to put an ending to the suffering your death had caused to my desperate heart. Just jumping out of a window would have been an excellent solution. But then, your son, which Davis and I had, in an irony of fate, called Daisuke junior, began weeping. He was hungry. And in this moment, I knew there was a reason to live, there was your child, the only thing I still had of you._

_And so I stayed alive, but you were dead, and with you, a part of me, a part of my heart, had died too. The dead people don't come back to life, and so shan't the part of me that faded away. I will never love anyone like I loved you._

- Mom'?

- Yes, darling?

But Daisuke junior wouldn't answer, _mom'_ was the only word he knew.

- TK, mom'.

Kari froze. TK. Another word. But how had he known? No one ever talked about his Takeru, the pain was still too recent.

- TK? Kari repeated, astonished.

The baby smiled, and then closed his blue eyes.

Then Kari closed hers too, and began swinging her son in her arms.

- Do you promise me? She asked.

No answer, but the baby beamed again.

- Then good night, darling. Sweet dreams, my TK.

_Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters but Daisuke junior. I hope you've enjoyed this short fanfic, it's the result of an afternoon without any work._

_~Alba_


End file.
